Right off I already hear some of you saying--I thought she thought she knew everything! LOL But we all know that none of us really know everything nor will we ever while on this earth. Some thoughts have just been drifting idly through my mind recently and I thought maybe I'd share a few.
Let's talk first about marriage. I know that marriage is hard work. I know that the only way to be successful at it is to have Christ in the center of it. I know that if you work through the bad times that good times can still be had. I don't know of anyone who has ever had a perfect marriage. I don't know of even one example in the Bible of a perfect marriage. I have worked diligently to find just one perfect marriage in there and if there is one, I missed it so please feel free to share if you know of one!! (Maybe Mary and Joseph but I'd like to know how she felt about having to travel so far when she was so near birth!) Of course the main reason for no perfect marriages is that there are no perfect spouses so there's that.
Children: I know that children can bring delight and love into a family. I know that if you don't kill them at some point then they will give you grandchildren that you can spoil and send back home. But I don't know any mother (other than Mary) who reared a perfect child. I do not know a single child who at some point between birth and 25 did not give their parents some kind of trouble. (I am apologizing now to those of you who just had your bubble to burst.)
Life: I do not know one single person whose life has turned out exactly like they had hoped or planned. But I know that life is precious. I know that there will be good and bad times. I know you will face disappoints along the way. I know there will be days filled with joy and days filled with sorrow. And I know that some days you feel so completely alone and unloved. But God loves you and is right there with you all the way.
Sin: I do not know a single person, other than Christ Jesus, who has not sinned in their life. I sin daily and perhaps you do also. I do know, however, that He is faithful and just to forgive us when we ask for forgiveness.
Most importantly though, I know that God knows what is going to take place in all of these areas. I know that only He can make a marriage last. I know that only He knows what lies ahead for our children. I know that He has a plan for my life and your life and the lives of those you love. And I also know that we have to learn to turn those things over to Him and allow Him to show us the way to go.
So, there you have some random thoughts. Thanks for reading!!
Monday, October 14, 2019
Friday, September 6, 2019
Are We Like the Israelites?
Sometimes when I am reading in the Old Testament, I think--what is wrong with these people? God had provided so much for the Israelites and they never seemed to appreciate it. He took them out of bondage--but they wanted to go back. He fed them daily--but they wanted something more and different. He told them exactly what to do--yet, they wanted to do things their own way.
Oh wait. Was I talking about the Israelites or was I talking about America? Or, even worse, was I talking to myself--and maybe you, too? Oh, now, wait a minute. I am sure you do everything just the right way. Not only what God said in the Old Testament but His words through His Son, Jesus, in the New Testament. Or maybe, like me, you often fail.
God has a purpose and a plan for each of our lives. Jeremiah 29:11 says "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end." He also has a bigger picture plan. God tells us what we need to know about family such as the relationships we have with our parents. Exodus 20:12 tell us, "Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee." And our spouse. In Colossians 3:18-19 the Bible says, "Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them." He tells us how to raise our children. Proverbs 22:6 says "Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it." He tells us even how to deal with those people we don't like so much. “But I say unto you which hear, Love your enemies, do good to them which hate you, Bless them that curse you, and pray for them which despitefully use you.” Luke 6:27-28
But more than that--He gives us an order for things. And herein lies what I think is one of our biggest problems. We don't like His order. We don't want to do things the way He tells us to do them. We don't want to wait on His timing. Then we get all in a mess and our first cry out to Him is "Lord, why did YOU let me get into this mess? " Can't you just see Him shaking His head? Can't you just hear Him say, "Child, this mess is not of My making. I gave you free will to make all of your own decisions. You made these choices, not Me. You chose not to follow the directions I gave you. But I love you still because you are My child. And I am still here to help you."
Any toes getting stepped on here besides mine? Why are we so much like the Israelites that we think we know better than God does? Why have we as an individual or a society or a nation decided that God's plans are no longer valid. He tells us plainly the things He hates in Proverbs 6:16-19 "These six things doth the Lord hate: yea, seven are an abomination unto him: A proud look, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, An heart that deviseth wicked imaginations, feet that be swift in running to mischief, A false witness that speaketh lies, and he that soweth discord among brethren." Yet we do these things--some of them daily.
He tells us exactly what He desires for us to do. He gives us an entire Book on how to live, what choices to make, how to serve. Yet, here we go again all free will and such and decide to just do our own thing. Where we often should have shame, we have a celebration. Where we should be falling on our faces in the presence of the almighty God and begging for forgiveness, we are posting pictures on social media. But this is not a surprise to the Lord either--2 Timothy 3:1-5 "This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come. 2 For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, 3 Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, 4 Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God; 5 Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away." And you must admit that this is where we are in our nation. We have moved away from God's plan and inserted man's plan in its place. We want to forget what He says and do what we want.
So, perhaps I need to take it a little easier on the Israelites. Just like them, I (we) know exactly what God desires for and from each of us. And just like them we want to do it on our way. Think on that.
Oh wait. Was I talking about the Israelites or was I talking about America? Or, even worse, was I talking to myself--and maybe you, too? Oh, now, wait a minute. I am sure you do everything just the right way. Not only what God said in the Old Testament but His words through His Son, Jesus, in the New Testament. Or maybe, like me, you often fail.
God has a purpose and a plan for each of our lives. Jeremiah 29:11 says "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end." He also has a bigger picture plan. God tells us what we need to know about family such as the relationships we have with our parents. Exodus 20:12 tell us, "Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee." And our spouse. In Colossians 3:18-19 the Bible says, "Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them." He tells us how to raise our children. Proverbs 22:6 says "Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it." He tells us even how to deal with those people we don't like so much. “But I say unto you which hear, Love your enemies, do good to them which hate you, Bless them that curse you, and pray for them which despitefully use you.” Luke 6:27-28
But more than that--He gives us an order for things. And herein lies what I think is one of our biggest problems. We don't like His order. We don't want to do things the way He tells us to do them. We don't want to wait on His timing. Then we get all in a mess and our first cry out to Him is "Lord, why did YOU let me get into this mess? " Can't you just see Him shaking His head? Can't you just hear Him say, "Child, this mess is not of My making. I gave you free will to make all of your own decisions. You made these choices, not Me. You chose not to follow the directions I gave you. But I love you still because you are My child. And I am still here to help you."
Any toes getting stepped on here besides mine? Why are we so much like the Israelites that we think we know better than God does? Why have we as an individual or a society or a nation decided that God's plans are no longer valid. He tells us plainly the things He hates in Proverbs 6:16-19 "These six things doth the Lord hate: yea, seven are an abomination unto him: A proud look, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, An heart that deviseth wicked imaginations, feet that be swift in running to mischief, A false witness that speaketh lies, and he that soweth discord among brethren." Yet we do these things--some of them daily.
He tells us exactly what He desires for us to do. He gives us an entire Book on how to live, what choices to make, how to serve. Yet, here we go again all free will and such and decide to just do our own thing. Where we often should have shame, we have a celebration. Where we should be falling on our faces in the presence of the almighty God and begging for forgiveness, we are posting pictures on social media. But this is not a surprise to the Lord either--2 Timothy 3:1-5 "This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come. 2 For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, 3 Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, 4 Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God; 5 Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away." And you must admit that this is where we are in our nation. We have moved away from God's plan and inserted man's plan in its place. We want to forget what He says and do what we want.
So, perhaps I need to take it a little easier on the Israelites. Just like them, I (we) know exactly what God desires for and from each of us. And just like them we want to do it on our way. Think on that.
Tuesday, August 20, 2019
Husbands, Wives and Others
Not long ago I posted a blog titled Mr. and Mrs. and Me about the role of in-laws in a marriage. Today I want to go a little further and talk about the importance of husbands and wives putting each other first--and that includes not only family members but also friends, coworkers, etc.
“Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.” Matthew 19:6 When a couple makes a covenant in front of God, family and friends, this verse is part of the ceremony. It IS a covenant, not a contract, and God is the One who has joined the couple together. In the first part of Hebrews 13:4 the Bible says "Marriage is honourable in all..." Another way of saying this is that marriage is to be honored, first by the couple but also those around them. The verse goes on to talk about defiling the marriage bed by having sexual relationships outside of the marriage--although sometimes emotional connections are even stronger and can be just as detrimental. Marriage is to be revered, respected and treated as a great treasure. That also means to me that since the covenant is between husband, wife and God that others are not to try to break that bond by influencing one to go against what God has to say about marriage. God sees marriage as a precious jewel. Those outside of the marriage who try to create trouble within the marriage of someone else are taking a great risk. Whenever one goes against what God teaches, trouble looms ahead.
In Ephesians chapter 5 beginning with verse 21, we are given the instruction to submit to one another. This is relational. Husbands and wives are required to maintain the same type of interaction with one another as God has with His Church. Nowhere in these scriptures are Christian instructed to be influenced by those outside of the marriage. It just frightens me today to see so often that people choose to put their marriage on the back burner and to put everything and everyone else first. A marriage like this is not what God designed. It is not what He planned. It is not what we should do.
So, what do you do if you realize you have fallen into this trap? Stop now. Return to your spouse and put the marriage first. Friends and family, whether older or younger, cannot be allowed to interfere with your marriage--the covenant that you made.
“And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband: But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife.” 1 Corinthians 7:10-11
Reconcile if you have strayed and ask God to help you to always put your marriage at the top of your relationship list under the relationship with Him. Everybody hits rough spots. But God commands us to maintain the relationship that you vowed to have and honor it above all else.
We often say only young people allow friends to get in the way, but that is not true. I see many long time married couples who spend much more time with friends than with their spouse. Be careful, regardless of how long you've been married, that you do not allow outsiders to influence you. If we follow along with God's plan, our marriages will be blessed.
Proverbs 5:18 “Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife *{and husband} of thy youth.” *brackets added by me
“Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.” Matthew 19:6 When a couple makes a covenant in front of God, family and friends, this verse is part of the ceremony. It IS a covenant, not a contract, and God is the One who has joined the couple together. In the first part of Hebrews 13:4 the Bible says "Marriage is honourable in all..." Another way of saying this is that marriage is to be honored, first by the couple but also those around them. The verse goes on to talk about defiling the marriage bed by having sexual relationships outside of the marriage--although sometimes emotional connections are even stronger and can be just as detrimental. Marriage is to be revered, respected and treated as a great treasure. That also means to me that since the covenant is between husband, wife and God that others are not to try to break that bond by influencing one to go against what God has to say about marriage. God sees marriage as a precious jewel. Those outside of the marriage who try to create trouble within the marriage of someone else are taking a great risk. Whenever one goes against what God teaches, trouble looms ahead.
In Ephesians chapter 5 beginning with verse 21, we are given the instruction to submit to one another. This is relational. Husbands and wives are required to maintain the same type of interaction with one another as God has with His Church. Nowhere in these scriptures are Christian instructed to be influenced by those outside of the marriage. It just frightens me today to see so often that people choose to put their marriage on the back burner and to put everything and everyone else first. A marriage like this is not what God designed. It is not what He planned. It is not what we should do.
So, what do you do if you realize you have fallen into this trap? Stop now. Return to your spouse and put the marriage first. Friends and family, whether older or younger, cannot be allowed to interfere with your marriage--the covenant that you made.
“And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband: But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife.” 1 Corinthians 7:10-11
Reconcile if you have strayed and ask God to help you to always put your marriage at the top of your relationship list under the relationship with Him. Everybody hits rough spots. But God commands us to maintain the relationship that you vowed to have and honor it above all else.
We often say only young people allow friends to get in the way, but that is not true. I see many long time married couples who spend much more time with friends than with their spouse. Be careful, regardless of how long you've been married, that you do not allow outsiders to influence you. If we follow along with God's plan, our marriages will be blessed.
Proverbs 5:18 “Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife *{and husband} of thy youth.” *brackets added by me
Monday, June 10, 2019
End of an Era--Beginning of a New Season
I am going to admit right off that I started writing this when I still had 14 working days left and will probably add to it until my final day. I haven't decided if I'm going to work all of those days and thinking right now that June 27th will probably be my last day.
That being said, I do have some thoughts about this transition. It amazes me that the first question everybody asks is "What are you going to do now?" My general response is to laugh and say "I'm going to sleep for the first six months!" And that is pretty true. I do not intend to make any long term commitments for the first 6 months unless God drops something in my lap.
Here's the thing--I'm not retiring because I want to leave Holmes. I have been coming here on a daily basis since 1987 and the majority of my time here has been extremely pleasant (and I say that only because NO work place is perfect.) I have loved Holmes for a long time, it is an important part of who I am and I still love it. I grew up here and so did my boys. It is as much my home as any place. I'm retiring because I want to make my own schedule. If I was choosing to continue working on somebody else's time schedule I would stay right where I am. I have wonderful co-workers and I love these people I work with day to day. If I have to work full time--this is where I would want to be--so never think I'm leaving the full-time workforce because of Holmes. That is far from the truth.
So why am I retiring at the relatively young age of 58? Mainly because I'm tired. For several years I worked two positions that had me at work day and night. During much of that time I was also responsible for taking care of and checking on my mom, my mom's business, my aunt and my aunt's business. I spent most of my "off" time at assisted living and nursing homes. And that was ok. That was what I felt I was supposed to do, what I wanted to do, and I have no regrets for doing that. But it was taxing and took a toll on me physically, mentally and emotionally. So I just want to rest a bit. And do some things I've wanted to do for years but couldn't because I had to work. I want to go to lunch and a movie with a girlfriend in the middle of the week. I want to go on short trips. I want to enjoy this season of my life before, as my grandson said about his "pet" worm one time--I get old and rusty and die! ha ha But mostly--sleep! LOL (Call me lazy and I don't care. Mark will always have clean clothes and food and he is the only one I'm responsible to now! ha)
Another thing is that every day when I read the obits in the Clarion-Ledger I see more and more people my age and younger who are just dying! I have 32 years in the retirement system and I hate to think that I would just work until the end and never get to reap the fruits of my labor. On the other side of that, I have no guarantee that Mark and I are going to have another 30 years together and I want to be able to enjoy some time with him now. I want to be able to tag along to the dog trials. Also, I want to be able to go see my grands in everything they do. I don't want to be worried about taking off work because I have a meeting when one of them has something in the middle of the day at school. I want to enjoy them!! I want them to remember that I was there and that they were a very important part of my life.
My last reason, I think, is that I know God has used me in the lives of many students over the years but I feel that He has something new for me to do now. I want to be able to mentor younger wives and mothers. I want to be able to visit and cook for and help out other people when they are sick. I want to be able to touch lives in a different way. I have a multitude of things I want to do where I can just be a servant. I know God will supply our needs wherever He guides me because He has never let us down in our lifetimes. I wish to be a better follower of Him and contributor to His work in my latter years than I have in my previous years.
I had been working on a plan for the past few weeks and just today got the answers I needed to see that it was not going to work out. That is ok because that just means I got ahead of God's plan. He knows and I am letting Him set the tone and the timetable.
I will admit that occasionally I have a moment of fear. But every time I do, I get an answer to calm me. One day it was through a southern gospel song that came on the radio. Another time it was in the form of message from my pastor on being fearful. And Mark is so supportive and assures me we will be ok. He has made sure we were ok for 37 years so no need to doubt that now.
Right now I am sitting at my cleaned off desk in my empty office. I did feel a tinge of sadness this morning but talked to a friend and it passed. It is the people I will miss. My second family--some I am closer to than blood relatives. Tomorrow will be my last day. And my last registration. I thought I was pretty smart to end on a busy day so there will be no time for tears of sadness.
So, today retirement started. I slept late (of course), changed sheets, did laundry, ironed clothes. vacuumed and mopped kitchen and make some snickerdoodles. I know, not much rest but so relaxing to work at my own pace--which is slow. ha ha Here's to new beginnings! Can't wait to see what God has in store for this new season of my life!!!
Wednesday, March 6, 2019
Slow Down the Pace
Every day, for a multitude of reasons, I become more and more concerned for our children and young people. I just want to share some of these thoughts with you today. These are my personal thoughts so feel free to have a different opinion--that doesn't bother me at all.
For some reason, somebody, somewhere decided that children should not be allowed to be children. It seems they should be reading before they can walk and writing sentences before they can make one. I know that is a little exaggerated--but not much. Why are we in such a rush for our children, who only have a little time to be carefree, to move out of childhood into adulthood? I am constantly saying to no one in particular and to everyone who will listen--WHAT IS THE RUSH???!!!!
Think back to your own childhood. Some of you are younger than me (which is more and more frequent these days) but I imagine that even those of you who are in your 30s remember childhood being a time of fun and discovery. I know I grew up in a different time out in the country, but I remember days spent playing outside. Some of my fondest memories are of days when time had no meaning to me. I remember playing in Kim Suiter's playhouse and walking to her grandmother's house. As I got older I remember putting a quilt under the walnut tree in the front yard during the summer and staying there for a long time reading books. I remember playing in the mud and learning to ride my bike. And some memories are funny now but weren't then... like my brother dragging my bike behind his with a rope and me not staying upright--no he didn't stop! Or the times we fought and I always got the worst whipping because he'd go first and make Momma mad because he laughed and then I'd get to make up for it! But it was a good time. I learned things that were beneficial to me as an adult while I was growing up--like how to do laundry and cook and clean house. But I also learned how to entertain myself. Once I was old enough to read, I read through the entire Childcraft series we had--some of you remember those red and white books your parents got with the World Books!!! And here is the craziest thing in all the world---I did not have any "formal" education until I was 6 years old and went to the 1st grade!!!!!!!! HORROR OF HORRORS!
Now, I already hear your responses--there is so much more for children to learn today. But I beg to differ. Didn't you learn to read and do math (real math not some of this crazy stuff) and study health and history and science? Well, kids today have to learn the same things. Oh, but what about technology? you say. What about it? I didn't grow up with technology but I work every single day using it. Children don't have to know how to open their iPad before they know how to open the door. They will learn what they need to learn along the way---just like you did. Just like I did. Just like every generation from the beginning of time did. Slow down with your children. Turn off the TV and talk to them. Teach them to entertain themselves. (We all know that playing make-believe is one of the best things for a child to do to help develop their intelligence and social skills.) Let's take more time teaching our children about the fruits of the Spirit. Teach them to be good and kind and compassionate and empathetic. Teach them about Jesus and what He did for them. Sing songs. Dance. Run races. Laugh. But, slow down. I promise you with all my heart that you will not regret one single minute you spend with them and long after you are gone, they will tell stories about things you did together. (Y'all know my stories about building fences with my Daddy before I was school age!)
Next, I'm going to talk about something that will probably get me in lots and lots of trouble but at this point I don't care. (This is my personal blog, by the way.) Why are y'all in such a hurry for your teenagers to become adults and get out of your house? Haven't you already seen that being an adult is not the greatest thing in the world? Haven't you ever longed to go back to be dependent on your parents to worry about the bills? Why does anybody think that a 20 year old is ready to take on the world? I know they think they are but you know that 99% of them are not. So why are in such a rush to get them out of college? Yes, I know money is an issue. Yes, I know that taking classes at the high school is less expensive. But really, is it that important? Those students who qualify for those classes are going to be able to get some scholarship money. And, anyway, as a Junior and Senior in high school were you TRULY concerned about your college and career choices? Not me. I was having the time of my life--especially my senior year when I only needed 3 more credits to graduate. I enjoyed every single minute of that year. No stress. No pressure. Time to be a teenager and learn things that were going to be important in my adult life. My dad got cancer the first time while I was in high school. My mom stayed in Memphis with him the entire time. I went to school but I also was given the responsibility of paying the bills from their account. So I had to learn how to be sure bills were paid on time. That turned out to be much more helpful to me in adulthood than taking college algebra would have. And if your child has the opportunity to go to a community college on an academic scholarship, you could be harming yourself by getting all of those college courses early. You may also hurt their chances of getting "freshman" scholarships at a university if they go straight there. It is ok to take 4-5 years to get out of college. It is ok to start off as a freshman with freshman classes. Yes, I know each of you have children who are extremely academically gifted. But, again I say, it is perfectly OK to take freshman classes your freshman year. Most of us are not socially, emotionally, nor cognitively mature enough at 17 or 18 to be taking junior and senior level college classes. I know you are under pressure from the principal and counselors because they are under pressure from the superintendent because they are under pressure from MDE because they are under pressure from the legislature---most who are NOT educators. Let your academically gifted child take AP courses instead. I think they need time during their high school years to enjoy high school. I'm perfectly fine with a high school student having a job as long as it allows them to still be involved in school. I want them to learn to cook and do laundry and iron clothes and change a tire (or a light bulb) and have time to learn about dealing with friends and people who pretend to be your friends. But they can't learn those things if they are so busy getting a college education in high school that it takes up all of their time. I know this is not setting well with some of you, but again, my personal blog, my personal thoughts. (And, of course, I think you should be at Holmes for 4 semesters anyway! :) )
So the big take away--slow down the pace with your children. They don't have to participate in every activity that comes along. They don't have to be an adult by the time they are 5. We know that theory was debunked years ago--children are not miniature adults! Children do not have the mind of teenager. Teenagers do not have the mind of an adult. From my heart--the heart of a teacher and a grandmother--let your children enjoy growing up. You ENJOY watching them grow up and participate in their lives. Slow down. Take time. Adulthood comes soon enough, you know.
For some reason, somebody, somewhere decided that children should not be allowed to be children. It seems they should be reading before they can walk and writing sentences before they can make one. I know that is a little exaggerated--but not much. Why are we in such a rush for our children, who only have a little time to be carefree, to move out of childhood into adulthood? I am constantly saying to no one in particular and to everyone who will listen--WHAT IS THE RUSH???!!!!
Think back to your own childhood. Some of you are younger than me (which is more and more frequent these days) but I imagine that even those of you who are in your 30s remember childhood being a time of fun and discovery. I know I grew up in a different time out in the country, but I remember days spent playing outside. Some of my fondest memories are of days when time had no meaning to me. I remember playing in Kim Suiter's playhouse and walking to her grandmother's house. As I got older I remember putting a quilt under the walnut tree in the front yard during the summer and staying there for a long time reading books. I remember playing in the mud and learning to ride my bike. And some memories are funny now but weren't then... like my brother dragging my bike behind his with a rope and me not staying upright--no he didn't stop! Or the times we fought and I always got the worst whipping because he'd go first and make Momma mad because he laughed and then I'd get to make up for it! But it was a good time. I learned things that were beneficial to me as an adult while I was growing up--like how to do laundry and cook and clean house. But I also learned how to entertain myself. Once I was old enough to read, I read through the entire Childcraft series we had--some of you remember those red and white books your parents got with the World Books!!! And here is the craziest thing in all the world---I did not have any "formal" education until I was 6 years old and went to the 1st grade!!!!!!!! HORROR OF HORRORS!
Now, I already hear your responses--there is so much more for children to learn today. But I beg to differ. Didn't you learn to read and do math (real math not some of this crazy stuff) and study health and history and science? Well, kids today have to learn the same things. Oh, but what about technology? you say. What about it? I didn't grow up with technology but I work every single day using it. Children don't have to know how to open their iPad before they know how to open the door. They will learn what they need to learn along the way---just like you did. Just like I did. Just like every generation from the beginning of time did. Slow down with your children. Turn off the TV and talk to them. Teach them to entertain themselves. (We all know that playing make-believe is one of the best things for a child to do to help develop their intelligence and social skills.) Let's take more time teaching our children about the fruits of the Spirit. Teach them to be good and kind and compassionate and empathetic. Teach them about Jesus and what He did for them. Sing songs. Dance. Run races. Laugh. But, slow down. I promise you with all my heart that you will not regret one single minute you spend with them and long after you are gone, they will tell stories about things you did together. (Y'all know my stories about building fences with my Daddy before I was school age!)
Next, I'm going to talk about something that will probably get me in lots and lots of trouble but at this point I don't care. (This is my personal blog, by the way.) Why are y'all in such a hurry for your teenagers to become adults and get out of your house? Haven't you already seen that being an adult is not the greatest thing in the world? Haven't you ever longed to go back to be dependent on your parents to worry about the bills? Why does anybody think that a 20 year old is ready to take on the world? I know they think they are but you know that 99% of them are not. So why are in such a rush to get them out of college? Yes, I know money is an issue. Yes, I know that taking classes at the high school is less expensive. But really, is it that important? Those students who qualify for those classes are going to be able to get some scholarship money. And, anyway, as a Junior and Senior in high school were you TRULY concerned about your college and career choices? Not me. I was having the time of my life--especially my senior year when I only needed 3 more credits to graduate. I enjoyed every single minute of that year. No stress. No pressure. Time to be a teenager and learn things that were going to be important in my adult life. My dad got cancer the first time while I was in high school. My mom stayed in Memphis with him the entire time. I went to school but I also was given the responsibility of paying the bills from their account. So I had to learn how to be sure bills were paid on time. That turned out to be much more helpful to me in adulthood than taking college algebra would have. And if your child has the opportunity to go to a community college on an academic scholarship, you could be harming yourself by getting all of those college courses early. You may also hurt their chances of getting "freshman" scholarships at a university if they go straight there. It is ok to take 4-5 years to get out of college. It is ok to start off as a freshman with freshman classes. Yes, I know each of you have children who are extremely academically gifted. But, again I say, it is perfectly OK to take freshman classes your freshman year. Most of us are not socially, emotionally, nor cognitively mature enough at 17 or 18 to be taking junior and senior level college classes. I know you are under pressure from the principal and counselors because they are under pressure from the superintendent because they are under pressure from MDE because they are under pressure from the legislature---most who are NOT educators. Let your academically gifted child take AP courses instead. I think they need time during their high school years to enjoy high school. I'm perfectly fine with a high school student having a job as long as it allows them to still be involved in school. I want them to learn to cook and do laundry and iron clothes and change a tire (or a light bulb) and have time to learn about dealing with friends and people who pretend to be your friends. But they can't learn those things if they are so busy getting a college education in high school that it takes up all of their time. I know this is not setting well with some of you, but again, my personal blog, my personal thoughts. (And, of course, I think you should be at Holmes for 4 semesters anyway! :) )
So the big take away--slow down the pace with your children. They don't have to participate in every activity that comes along. They don't have to be an adult by the time they are 5. We know that theory was debunked years ago--children are not miniature adults! Children do not have the mind of teenager. Teenagers do not have the mind of an adult. From my heart--the heart of a teacher and a grandmother--let your children enjoy growing up. You ENJOY watching them grow up and participate in their lives. Slow down. Take time. Adulthood comes soon enough, you know.
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