" Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you." Ephesians 4:31-32
This morning as I was reading my devotion I felt God tap me on the shoulder and say, "Are you paying attention to this?" I didn't want to admit that I was trying to make it be all about somebody else when it was really hitting very close to home with me. The devotion was about Joseph and that no matter what circumstances he was in--sold by his brothers, falsely accused by his master's wife, put in jail--God still showed favor toward him because Joseph always honored Him. And if anybody had a reason to be bitter, I believe, Joseph did. But he never was. Not once does the Bible tell us that Joseph grew bitter.
I tend to be more like Jonah. I am more likely to say, "Therefore now, O LORD, take, I beseech thee, my life from me; for it is better for me to die than to live." Jonah 4:3. I often feel bitterness toward people or situations because I feel like they got the blessing when I did the work. I may even be angry at my "gourd". You may have had moments like this. You know, when God is blessing somebody else and you are thinking that you should have that blessing. Even you have not been asking for it. God was speaking with Jonah and said, "Then said the LORD, Doest thou well to be angry?" v4:4. And Jonah felt he did have the right to be angry. He grew bitter.
As we look at these two great men of the Bible, we know that God used them both. They both were put in difficult circumstances. But the difference is in their response. Joseph honored God and prospered; Jonah pouted. He had literally been saved by God but he didn't want to share that blessing.
I am often a Jonah; and not because I WANT to be like Jonah. I would much rather be like Joseph. I would much rather deal with the circumstances and honor God no matter what. I would rather believe whole-heartledly, holding nothing back but fully trusting God. I want to believe that even when I feel mistreated and abused and used and lied about and tossed into an emotional jail that God is still in control and can still bless me. That is what I WANT to do. That is what I should strive to do.
So I had to ask the Lord to forgive me for holding on to the bitterness that I've had in my heart for a few years (yes, YEARS, and I know that is bad). Did I immediately jump up and make peace with everyone that I felt the bitterness toward? No, mainly because they would have no idea what I was asking forgiveness for anyway. But God knows. And while I am sure I will struggle again with these feelings, I know that hour by hour, day by day, if I keep asking the Lord to help me not let the bitterness take root that He will.
If you are struggling with bitterness that has taken root in your heart, I hope that today you too will ask God to remove that bitterness and help you not to let it take root again. Let us remember these words daily "If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men."Romans 12:18
